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Monday, March 12, 2012

My Current Prayers

Pre-blog note: this, and many other blog post referring to Baby Whimsy will be completely unremarkable to the majority of this blogs readers.  If this is you, please fill free to close this pages window and move onto your next blog of choice... I have read that I should have a pregnancy journal for Baby Whimsy but instead of a journal filled with my messy handwriting, I have decided to occasionally blog about things that occupy my time and thoughts when it comes to Baby Whimsy.  Please bear with me, in a few months this blog will be filled with cute pictures and funny stories... until then, you just get me.

And another note - if you are still reading, please know that Mr. Whimsy and I  were very happy to hear that Baby Whimsy looks healthy and is growing at the correct rate according to my latest ultrasound.  This blog post is just on some of the thoughts and prayers I have had being pregnant.

Many of you know that I like to read - a lot.  I have always enjoyed reading, even when I was younger I would take my Babysitters Club books for just about any trip we took, even if we were only going into town.  Today I belong to a book club with a group of girlfriends - and we seriously read and talk about a selected book each month.  I generally am reading about 2-3 books at a time (the book of choice usually depends on my location - i.e. the car, living room, bedroom, etc.).

I have never really actually regretted reading any book (except for one horrible book I picked up in Italy and finished reading because there was nothing else to do while on the train)... that is, I never regretting reading books until I got pregnant.  Now all these interesting stories that provided hours of entertainment in the past have resulting in more and more health concerns that I have for Baby Whimsy.  

Mr. Whimsy and I truly did not have a boy/girl preference, we (like all parents-to-be) just wanted a healthy baby.  We pray(ed) that God would protect the baby while in the womb, as it develops so that it is physically and mentally strong and healthy.  This is when my prayers begin to go down a never ending (and somewhat terrifying) trail, thanks to books.  

I start with prayers for basic health for Baby Whimsy.  Then I remember reading about a baby with brittle bone disease and I pray Baby Whimsy has strong bones.  Then I remember another book with a child that had mental health problems and I pray for a healthy brain.  The week we found out I was pregnant, my book club read a book where one of the characters had a handful of miscarriages - I pray that Baby Whimsy makes it to full term and is a lively child.Then there was that book with the baby with a bad heart waiting for a transplant... can't forget to pray for a strong beating heart.    And the list goes on and on, ranging from rare, one in a million diseases (even made up ones like being a time traveler) to things more common but just as devastating to a family.  

Then after my mind is completely overwhelmed and the different afflictions are ever present I try to get a grip and I tell myself "this child is especially chosen for us, by God.  He (God) will provide and protect."   This usually brings me back to reality and I move on to pray for something that is just as (or really more) important to me for Baby Whimsy.  I pray that we (Mr. Whimsy and I) do our part in bringing Baby Whimsy up in Christ.  I pray Baby Whimsy knows God, relies on God, trust in God, and above all, is a Child of God.  

It sounds silly but I have noticed when there is a particularly moving song in church, or the preacher says something I really want to remember, I put my hand on my belly and, as silly as it sounds, I want Baby Whimsy to get/know/absorb that thing.  I know the baby can't hear yet but I still find myself hoping to ingrain worship songs and Bible verses into its soul. Its kind of my way of telling Baby Whimsy "if you are born knowing only one thing, know this one.  Its important."

Our church (which we LOVE and recommend to anyone looking for a church home) is The Ark in Conroe.  Our preacher, Pastor Alan, regularly reminds the congregation that it is the parents role to bring a child up in Christ, and if he/she is brought up in Christ, he/she will have that foundation for the rest of their lives.  I pray that Baby Whimsy has a foundation in Christ to rely on in the future.

So, those are my current prayers for Baby Whimsy... physical, mental and spiritual.  For the time being I am (trying) to stay away from sad books with stories about kids/babies.  

Moms - am I completely crazy or are these types of thoughts somewhat normal?  What type of things did you find yourself obsessing about?

2 comments:

  1. you deserve a prize, as you have so eloquently put into words what EVERY mother/mother to be thinks and feels. i almost had to (and still have to!) block out or carefully screen every story that revolves around the stage I currently am in. (For instance, right now any news story about pre-schoolers or toddlers is off limits to both t and i.) in fact, that's why i passed on the pregnancy book i did...it was just enough to educate me, but not enough to scare me when i was in that stage.!
    it can be just too much to handle. and thats why i am so thankful that there is a God who gets that and takes it and handles it. so props to you for being able to recognize that.

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